Updates

So the reason it took me years to start a blog was because I was afraid I wouldn't have anything really exciting to blog about. We're quite boring at our house. Also, I was afraid I wouldn't keep up with it. My fears have been validated- it's been since June 11 that I last blogged. So, sorry to those of you who follow my blog. I'm going to try to do better.

So I guess the purpose of this blog is simply to catch up and let you all know what's up in our world. I'll start with the adults and work towards the children.

Jason:He did not get an administrator's job this year, so he's still teaching at the high school. He's got some Geometry and some Algebra II classes. He finishes his Program of Study for his Superintendent's License this semester. He's doing an internship this fall along with one class. In the spring, he'll finish up with a second internship for his license as a Curriculum Administrator. I'm really proud of him and all his hard work. He's done everything he can to make himself marketable and qualified for many different positions. I know that his hard work will pay off, but its definitely hard to wait for God's timing in this. He's put in a lot of time (and money) to get these degrees and he's anxious to use them, but he's trying to learn what he can from where he currently is.

Me: I'm working in my second year as a school counselor. It really is a great job! I think I like it even better this year since I know what I'm doing somewhat. A lot of the anxieties that I had at the beginning of last year have faded. Other than that, I just take care of my child and my house, get some exercise in, and hang out with my boys. It's really a good life- a boring life to some- but a good, drama-free life, which is what I prefer!

Cade: Cade turns three next week. Its so hard to believe. Jason and I went through his clothes and toys yesterday and got rid of some and put some up for storage. Every time I do that, I get a little sad. Some of the clothes Sammy will be able to wear, but I hate putting away those clothes that he looked so cute in and thinking about the fact that he's too big for them. He's so funny these days though. My child is so verbal! He never stops talking and has quite the imagination. He makes up stories about his make-believe monkey Moy-Moy. Last week, Moy-Moy was in the hospital because Cade swung on his tail and hurt him. Who knows? He's still big into sports- he has a shoot-around every night in his "basketball room", we have batting practice, and every ball is a soccer ball. His birthday party theme is going to be sports this year- it may be a recurring theme, but oh well! So, he's a mess, but he's so sweet and cute.

Sammy: There's still no timeline on when my other baby will be here. We have heard updates on the process in the last few months- the Haitian government has approved us to adopt and is in the process of matching up his paperwork with ours. The U.S. government has approved our visa application, so we're almost through that process as well. Jason and I are going to visit in November during Family Visitation Week and I'm looking forward to seeing him. We're really hoping that this will be the last visitation week. Keep praying for God's favor over that paperwork and improved efficiency from the Haitian government. I can't wait to get my two boys together! :)

So, that's where we currently are. I'll try to update more often as my son does funny things or we go on new adventures, and especially as we hear more from Haiti!

God bless,
Manesseh

Well, as I told someone today, I really don't know what we're going to do when our boys reach the age where they are involved in all kinds of activities. Somehow we have managed to busy ourselves pretty much every night for the past few months. However, we're loving life together as a family and it sure makes time go by quickly which means that every day we're closer to the day that Sammy will join us. At the same time, Cade is so stinking funny right now that I hate for this time to go by so quickly. I'm just trying to savor every moment. Some recent pics of what we've been up to:

This is our family on Easter. I love this picture mainly because I love Cade's tie. Is that not the cutest thing you've ever seen? We rolled up his sleeves and left his shirt untucked (mainly because it would have been that way shortly even if I had tucked it in), but he was styling. He had a great time hunting eggs this year and he asks me at least once a week if it is Easter yet. Then he'll answer his own question by telling me that it is "far, far away."

A few weeks ago we visited the Oklahoma City Zoo. It was probably 95 degrees that day, but that didn't stop us. Cade really enjoyed it for a few hours, then he got hot and tired and just wanted it to be over. He really liked watching the snakes and reptiles, and he liked petting the goats and seeing the sea lion swim, but his favorite was definitely the monkeys. They were very active when we went in the monkey house (air conditioned- so we spent a long time there) and he just giggled at them as they played and "chased each other". One of them ran by and knocked on the glass right next to his head and he told me a million times, "That monkey hit the wall" and just giggled some more. I think he would have watched those monkeys all day long. This is a really good age for the zoo, but I think next time we'll wait till a day when its not so hot to go visit the animals.

This one explains pretty much every Wednesday night for our family. Geno's Pizza has a buffet on Wednesday night, so we have a standing date with my mom and dad. Somehow Cade manages to talk GiGi into buying him a chocolate chip cookie after he eats his pizza and this is what he ends up looking like most every week. Notice the chocolate is all over his arms as well as his face. I will say the boy knows how to eat a chocolate chip cookie. He usually halves the cookie and then eats with both hands until it is all gone. Most of the time, he'll share food, but he's not so keen on sharing his cookie. You've gotta love that kid!

So the other day we were at my mom's house. Mom and I were in the living room and all the sudden we hear, "GiGi, Mommy!" I yelled down the hallway to see what he wanted, and he responded, "GiGi, Mommy, my stuck! Help me!" So my mom went down the hallway and then yelled at me to come and see. This is what I found. He was jumping on her bed and somehow fell down in the crack between the bed and the footboard. He couldn't get himself out. So instead of helping him, of course I took a picture. What a goofball!

Anyway, that's just a few photos from lately. I'm sure they'll be many more in the upcoming weeks. It's almost summer for us. Jason's last day is tomorrow and mine is on Friday. This is one of the best parts of being in education (besides the warm fuzzies you feel inside because you help kids every day). We get a break together during the summer. I love that I get to spend my summer with my boys. I'm sure it will go by super fast as always.

We've had several people ask lately about Sammy and Jasmine, and we're still in waiting stage. We've done everything we can do. We're just waiting for the Haitian government to set an appointment to complete the process. So, please just keep praying for God's favor on that paperwork and on the process.

Anyway, there's just a little about what's been up with us. Yay for summertime spent together and memories to be made!

God Bless-
Manesseh

Higher Ways

If there's one thing I've learned in this life it is that God's ways are so much higher than mine. I always try to see God in the events that unfold in this life. Some times are easier than others, but I'm completely convinced that He knows what He's doing. That is what I cling to when I don't understand why. Lately I've been struggling with the why of this adoption process. Why, when He is so much bigger than any person or government, does He allow this process to take so long? Why, when these kiddos are missing the love of a family, does He make them wait longer? Why? As I was thinking about this the other day and reminding myself that He knows what He is doing, I began thinking about the fact that He has adopted us into His family. There are several verses in the New Testament that describe our adoption and our rights of sonship/daughtership that come with that, ultimately our home in Heaven with Him. Then I realized that He is showing us a little piece of what He must feel as we wait for Sammy to come home. We are His children and He wants us to be with Him. The Bible tells us that He is preparing a place for us there. However, as much as He may long for us to be with Him the same way we long for Sammy and Jasmine to be with us, there is preparation that has to be done. There is a will for us to accomplish here before we go there. There is preparation for us to do here in our home before our entire family is together. There is also preparation for Him to do in our hearts. And that is the why. Just as He patiently waits for us to join Him because his perfect will must be done, I must follow His example. So I'm trying to open my heart and allow Him to do what He pleases. I don't think my longing for Sammy's presence will go away, but I'm going to enjoy my time with my family of three as I stand on that promise that His ways are higher than mine and praise Him for that truth.

God Bless,
Manesseh


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Just Time for a Blog

Its been about a month since I have blogged, but with good reason: April is testing month. Anyone who knows anything about testing in schools knows that the people in charge of this are the school counselors. I'm not really sure how this fits into our job description and purpose, but traditionally it has been our baby. So the past month has been filled with planning, organizing, and pulling off testing stuff. It's not quite over yet, but we're on the downhill slide. My brain is pretty darn tired at this point! However, it has gone well for the most part. The perfectionist in me has jotted down some changes for the "next year" file, but for my first go-round, I'm pretty pleased!  So, now that I have a little time to blog, here are some updates on life at the Moore house.

First, only 6 weeks of school left for the students, and 7 for me! This year has FLOWN by and I have loved most every second of it. The teachers and staff at Kimmons are good people and they have made me feel so welcome. The students are sweet (as much as junior high kids can be) and I've learned quickly that all they want is someone to listen and care. If you show them that, then they'll love you forever! :)

Micah is coming home on June 2nd, so just a few more weeks. She'll finish up this month in Thailand and her last month is supposed to be in Malaysia- not really sure where yet.  Please continue to pray for her and her team.

The adoption process is underway. All of our paperwork has been submitted to the attorney in Haiti and hopefully at this point has been filed with the government. So its back to helplessly waiting. Haiti is in the midst of a governmental changeover. A new president was elected in March and will take office very shortly. That means that not only will the chief executive change, but also all of the heads of the cabinet departments. Most of the past cabinet leaders were anti-adoption, which caused the bureaucracy to run even slower through the adoption process. I understand that they want to protect their children, but my current prayer is that the new cabinet leaders will also understand that there are those of us who are adopting these children because we love them and because we want to give them the family that they do not currently have. Another piece of possible good news is that since those adoptions that were currently underway when the earthquake hit were expedited due to the United States offering humanitarian parole (those kiddos are in the U.S.), all of those files have been cleared out. That means that our paperwork should move up significantly on the pile. It is very possible that it can still be a long process, but I'm just praying God's favor over that paperwork. As always, I know His timing is perfect!

Jason is currently applying and interviewing for several administrator's jobs. So far, nothing has come of it. Getting this first job is difficult without any experience. I know he's getting a little discouraged. Its yet another thing that we're trusting God about. He's always been so faithful and I know this won't be any different, but at the same time it can be hard to see Him working along the way!

We've taken our house off the market. We got several calls on it and a few showings of it. However, after finding out that the adoption may take longer than expected, we decided to take the sign out of the yard. Its a small house that we got a great deal on so our payment is really fairly cheap (cheaper than most people's rent). If we stay here and don't upgrade yet, we can save more money every month so that we can travel to Haiti every few months to see our baby boy and my sweet sister. So, no more sign in the yard at least for now!

In the midst of all of this, my baby boy is growing up. He's two and a half now and he is FULLY POTTY TRAINED! Watch out! A couple of weeks ago, he brought me a Pull-up like he always did when he had to do his big business. That night, I refused to put it on him. He was either going to poop in the potty or poop in his pants- no more Pull-ups. I then went to Wal-Mart to get groceries, and while I was there, Jason texted me a picture of him smiling next to his poop in the potty. I'd share the picture, but I'm pretty sure you'd probably rather not look at his poop! :) Ever since then, when he needs to go, he just goes to the potty and does his business. He just all the sudden decided he was ready, like all you wise mothers told me he would.

He is also getting so funny- you just never know what's going to come out of his mouth. Here's my new list of "Cade-isms" (written as much for me to remember them all as for you to enjoy).

• He never stops talking and commentates his entire life. He tells everyone and everything (alive or not) hello and goodbye every time we go somewhere. Pulling out of our driveway in the morning includes a long slew of well wishes: "Bye, Charis. Bye, house. Bye, grass. Bye, trees. Bye, mailbox. Bye, motorcycle."
• He is super-addicted to Dora and Diego and is now picking up some Spanish. Just today, I heard him playing in the next room and counting in Spanish. He's also learning all about exotic animals from Diego. When Jason gave him the toy out of his Happy Meal last week and called it a bird, he quickly corrected him by saying, "That's not a bird, that's a toucan."
• He still loves all things sports. I'm sure that some of this is due to our brainwashing of him by taking him to athletic events from the time he was three weeks old. However, he just flat out enjoys them. We spend a lot of time running, tackling, sliding, catching, throwing, hitting, boxing, shooting, dunking, and dribbling. He can identify most any sport known to man. Give the kid a Sports Illustrated and he'll be busy for a good thirty minutes, turning through the pages and pointing out each sport. "That's basketball, that's golf, that's boxing, that's softball." 
• His new thing is to suggest what he wants to do by saying "How bout...?" When he wants me to set up his football guys for him, he says, "How bout Mommy build football guys?" When he wants to go play outside, its "How bout Cade go slide?". When its almost time for bed and he's ready to wind down, its "How bout we watch Tom and Jerry?". 
• Everything that we are going to do in the future happens on a Saturday to him. We told him a couple of weeks ago that we were going to the beach and a few days later he said, "Cade is going to the beach on Saturday." One day we told him that we were going to watch Mallorie play softball and later that day he told me, "Mal-Mal going to play softball on Saturday." We finally convinced him that we weren't going to the beach until this summer, but if you ask him, Mallorie plays softball every weekend!
• The child is like an elephant, he never forgets! He doesn't forget much of anything and he'll remind you if you do forget. We were looking through pictures on the computer the other day and he was commentating each one (as usual). One came up of us in Hawaii- by the way, he was nine months old when we went- and he of course said that we were at the beach, but he also said, "Cade fly in an airplane." There was a picture of him at his Mamaw's house a little after he turned one. You can't see the house in the picture at all and he's standing out in the grass, but he knew that he was at Mamaw's house. He recognizes the scenery around him I guess, though there's not much to go on. He soaks up everything so we have to be very careful about what we say around him. Neither Jason or I curse, but I don't really want him going around saying "crap" or "shutup" either! :)
• He's quite the little self-discipliner these days. When he does something he shouldn't and I ask him if he needs a spanking or needs to stand in the corner, he nods his head and says, "Uh-huh" as if he knows that he deserves some punishment for whatever he just did. I know he's really just being ornery, but it is quite funny.
• My favorite one is what he says when you ask him about Jesus. He tells us, "Jesus is in Cade's heart." Oh how my soul prays for him to grow to be a man who loves Jesus and chases after God's own heart.

He's a sweet, sweet boy most of the time. I am just blessed to have a healthy, happy, handsome little man. I'm ready for my other little man to get here because I'm sure they'll be even funnier together.

Again, I've rambled on and on. I guess I'm making up for four weeks of no blogging.Thanks for sticking with me! :) If you're the praying kind, keep praying for my sister, for the adoption, and for Jason's job. I'll keep you updated as life progresses.

God Bless,

Manesseh

Haiti

First off, let me say that I am still not completely emotionally stable after our trip to Haiti. I knew that it would be an exhausting trip and that I would not want to leave our sweet kids there. However, I really didn't know the toll it would take on me. It's been two days since I've been home and I still burst into tears randomly as I think about it (just ask the people at church this morning who got to witness it). I know that most of it is how much I miss Sammy and wish he were here with me, but the whole experience was just draining- physically and especially emotionally. As my mom so prudently put it, the week was "sensory overload"- the sights, the smells, the sounds- it all just bombarded us and I'm still working to process it all. I expected this to be a life-changing experience. It was definitely that, and more. So I'm going to attempt to describe our week as best I can. Hopefully just writing about it will help me process through it all (I really sound like a counselor now, don't I?).

We started our journey on Monday and traveled from Memphis to Port Au Prince with stops in Charlotte and Fort Lauderdale in between. The travel itself was quite uneventful and we arrived in Haiti around 3:00. However, the second we walked into the airport the chaos that is Haiti was apparent. The room in which the baggage claim and customs all took place was not very big and it was crowded with people. Most of them actually worked at the airport. There were men everywhere who would take your baggage claim number and go look for your luggage. They were all over the place and all were dressed the same, so we couldn't even tell who was "working" for us. There were several large mission groups who arrived at the same time that we did and the workers were piling their bags in different areas around the baggage claim. After about thirty minutes of us and the workers looking for our bags, we realized they weren't there. We suspected there might be an issue because we changed airlines in the middle of our journey, and sure enough- no baggage. Truthfully, I wasn't too upset about not having clothes or toiletries, but all of the goodies that we brought for the kids were in our checked luggage, so I was disappointed that I couldn't meet them bearing gifts. Finally we finished filing our claim at the baggage counter and were able to leave the airport. The second I walked out of the airport, I noticed how beautiful Haiti was. The mountains and the foliage on the island reminded me of Hawaii. However, overshadowing its beauty was the devastation. Across the street from the airport was a "tent city." Thousands upon thousands were displaced during the earthquake that happened over a year ago and many of those are still living in tents. I was prepared for this part of it because I knew that recovery was coming along very slowly, but I was not prepared for the rest. Haiti's infrastructure is non-existent. The roads are dirt, but they are not the dirt roads that we see in Arkansas. They are the kind of roads that Jeep owners seek out in order to have some fun with their toy, and we're talking about in the capital city. I thought for sure that this was a result of the earthquake as well, but we were quickly told that this was simply Haiti. Buildings are haphazardly built all over the city and up on the mountains. Piles of rubble and trash left from the earthquake lie along every street and wild pigs, goats, and dogs feast on the trash. There is no "business district", but people just sell random items at stands along the streets. I've seen poverty before, but not to this extent. Apparently 3% of the nation controls 90% of the wealth and there is no "middle class". In Haiti, you are either rich or you are poor. And when I say poor, I mean literally sleeping in a tent with dirt floors poor. We did enter some areas that had some nicer houses and restaurants, but these areas are few and far between. A good education is something that is available only to those who can afford it and some families have to choose which child(ren) they want to educate. Often it is the boys or it is the oldest child. Society is so different from America. We just never realized that when we decided to adopt these children, we were bringing them out of this. The thing is, they don't know the difference. Oh, what a shock they're in for! So, about 4:00 we finally made it to the guest house where we stayed for the week. They already had Jasmine and Sammy there waiting for us. We finally got to meet our children. Of course, mom and I both cried immediately. I'm sure Jasmine and Sammy thought we were crazy. Jasmine hugged us all and Sammy reluctantly came into my arms. It didn't take him long to warm up to me, though. By the time we fed them dinner and sat out by the pool for awhile, he and I were attached. As Jason says, Sammy likes his Daddy okay, but he loves his Mommy. Mommy feels the same way about him. Since we didn't have any of their stuff (it was all in our lost baggage), they went back to the orphanage for the night and we got some much needed rest.

Tuesday was the day we met with the attorney. She described the process to us and the steps that our paperwork would have to go through in order to finalize the adoption. I was disappointed to hear her estimation of how long it would take, as she said one to two years would be her guess. We all complain about the American bureaucracy being slow and inefficient, but apparently Haiti's is even worse. Plus, the government isn't really for out-of-country adoptions. For some reason, there is a stigma placed on families from industrialized countries wanting to adopt Haitian children. The government believes that they have ulterior motives and are exploiting the children. So, we're going to have to prove that we love these kiddos and just want to give them a good home and doing that takes time. After the attorney left, we spent the day at the guest house. This house was nice even for American standards. It had five bedrooms with bathrooms (each one housed a family that was there visiting their children), a large kitchen and dining area, and a living area where we could gather and let the kids play. Out back there was a nice pool and a shaded sitting area. So we let the kids swim and play together and visited with the other families who were there. Jasmine loves to swim but Sammy not so much. He did like sitting outside and watching the other kids though. Our luggage did show up and we got to spoil the kids! All in all, it was a relaxing day and it was great to get to know these other families. Though our friends and family have been so supportive as we've decided to go through this process, there's no way that they can truly understand it. It was great to be around people who understand the emotions, the frustration at the process, and the love that we have for these kids. We met people who have done this before and some who are in the same boat as us, but these kids bonded us all together and we had a great time together! Tuesday night was when we got to experience Sammy's "dark side". This kid can throw fits like you've never seen. He didn't want to go to bed when it was time. I suspect that it was because he was in a different place and felt insecure, but when I laid him on the bed, he screamed and kicked and turned himself in circles just thrashing about. When I finally got him calmed down, I had to rock him to sleep and then finally lay him down on the bed. After that, he slept okay. However, this was a nightly thing and we learned that this was his same reaction when he didn't get his way. So, Sammy's cute as he can be and he's sweet 95% of the time, but he's got some lungs on him and he's not afraid to use them when he's mad. It's something we'll have to work through!

Wednesday was beach day. Jasmine had only been to the beach one time and Sammy had never been, so this was quite an experience. The ride there may have been the most memorable part. All fifteen of us piled into a van not much bigger than a mini van. Apparently in Haiti, they don't believe in carseats, so we just held the kids in our laps. We drove an hour and a half in an van with no air conditioning on these crazy roads to get to the beach. Sammy loved it! He loves being in the car and he just chattered until he fell asleep. When we finally reached the beach, it was absolutely beautiful. I told Jason that with a lot of work, tourism could be a major industry here. The water was super clear and they had these beautiful cabanas with chairs underneath them where we sat and had lunch. Again, Jasmine had a great time, but Sammy wasn't a fan of the water. He was a fan of throwing rocks into the water though and we did that for a long time. We had a nice lunch and took a lot of pictures. We then traveled the hour and a half back to the guesthouse and spent the evening letting the kids play and chatting. Again, getting Sammy to sleep was a challenge, but we all slept pretty good that night.

Thursday was another field trip day. We took a trip to the Baptist Mission up in the mountains. It has a hospital, a little park, a very small area that resembled a petting zoo, an American restaurant, and a museum. Outside of the mission is a street market with all kinds of Haitian crafts and souvenirs. So, we took the kids to the little zoo area and Sammy came alive. He especially loved the monkey and just chatted with him in Creole as he giggled and banged on the cage. It was too cute! We fed the rabbits and petted the goats and he just talked to them all. Then we went to the restaurant. I think that Sammy and Jasmine were both a little overwhelmed, and rightfully so. We're talking about kids who rarely get out of the orphanage, and Sammy rarely gets out of a single room in the orphanage. There were tons of people at the restaurant, talking and eating. Jasmine grabbed on to mom and sort of hid behind her as we sat there and Sammy began one of his fits. He was only happy if he was laid on me with his head tucked under my chin. We never think about restaurants being something scary. We go all the time, almost every day in mine and Jason's case. Its such a weird feeling to put yourself in these kids' shoes. It just made me realize how much of an adjustment that they are going to have to make and how I need to be prepared to help support them in that adjustment. I guess that's what I can spent this year doing! :) Anyhow, we made it through lunch at the restaurant where Sammy ate a hot dog and two little bowls of ketchup. He loved the ketchup! He kept dipping his fingers in it and licking it off. By the time we left, he was filthy, but he had a great time. We did a little street shopping and bought some souvenirs. Jason loves that part because he loves to bargain with the vendors. We did get some good stuff, though! We rode back to the guest house to have dinner and spent the evening playing with our kids. We got to Skype with Jason's parents and Cade and Sammy got to hear each other's voices. I missed Cade oh so much but I also was so dreading leaving Sammy the next morning. I don't know if Sammy somehow knew that we were leaving the next day, but that night was not restful for any of us. He fell asleep fairly easily, but woke up and had a good thirty-minute fit. After the fit was over, he played for about an hour and a half before I could get him back to bed. Jason says he just wanted a little extra time with his Mommy. Anyway, when 5:30 AM came the next morning, both of us were completely exhausted.

Friday morning, we had to leave. Our ride was supposed to pick us up at 6:00, but we finally left the house around 7:30. Our flight was at 8:50 and it took about 30 minutes to get to the airport. So, we were a little nervous that we would even make our flight. The goodbyes were fairly hasty since we were running late, but I cried through all of that and all the way to the airport. When we got to the airport, there was a line out the door and halfway down the sidewalk. It was only 45 minutes until our flight left and I thought for sure we'd never make it. I said a quick prayer that we would make this flight and as soon as we got out of the car, we were ushered by some of those airport workers around the line and to the check-in station. We had to wait a little bit in line, but we made it to the plane in time. I don't know why we were treated such, but I know that my prayer was answered and we made it onto the flight and into the air back to the states, with me still crying.

It's been a few days and I still randomly cry. I miss Sammy so much. It was the weirdest feeling I've ever had. I wanted so much to get home to see Cade because I missed him terribly, but I wanted so much to stay there with Sammy until he could come home with me. I still feel like half of my heart is in Haiti. I realize that I've only spent four days with the child, but he's mine. God appointed him to be mine and He knew that we would fall in love with each other immediately. He's there in an orphanage where he's being cared for, but he's not getting the attention and love that I can give him. Jason and Cade and I are here at our home, but our family just doesn't feel complete anymore. God definitely confirmed that we are following Him in this adoption, but I'm thinking He's going to have a lot to teach us through this waiting process. So, that's where we are right now: waiting. I've pleaded with God and given Him all kinds of justification of why He should just perform a miracle right this second and let us go get our child. I have lots of good reasons and I know that He can do that should He choose. He's bigger than time itself and definitely bigger than the Haitian bureaucracy. I really hope that He chooses the miracle route, but I also know that His thoughts and ways are greater than mine and if we do have to wait a year or more to get this baby home, then there will be a reason for it. My prayer is that I can see Him work through this and that I'll understand His purposes in the end. My heart aches right now but I can only imagine the joy that this child will bring to our lives once this process is complete. More than anything, I'm thankful for this calling and that God is going to see us through this and shape us along the way. All praise and glory be to Him!

God Bless,
Manesseh

Gratitude

My word for the week is "gratitude." It just seems like this week has been full of events that have caused me to stop and thank God for my life and my family. It almost seems unfair that my life can be this good while so many people are going through so much. I know that God has chosen a path for each of us and He uses our experiences for His purpose, but for some of the students that I've talked to this week, life has been nothing but hard from day one. Its easy for me to understand why they are so hopeless. However, I know that God has put them in my path so that I can help them. He has also put them in my path so they can help me. This week they have helped me to be much less whiny about my life and to stop, take a breath, and count my blessings. So, here is my list of this week's realizations of what I'm thankful for. There are so many more, but here is what's on my heart.

1. I'm thankful for my parents. I'm thankful that they love me and they show it. My parents understood that when they got married, they were giving up some selfishness and when they had children, they were losing it all. Their lives became devoted to loving us, caring for us, and raising us in a way that was pleasing to God. I have such happy memories of childhood in a stable and loving family, and for that I am so grateful.

2. I'm thankful for my husband. He understands how to treat a woman and how a marriage is a partnership in which both parties contribute. There are times when he gets on my every last nerve, but he doesn't just tell me he loves me everyday, he shows me. I am married to my best friend and my partner in life and together we are creating the same type of household that I grew up in. My kids will also get to experience what stability and love means.

3. I'm thankful for my education. I had the opportunity to do anything I wanted to do. I had good teachers all the way through school who were positive and encouraging and who told me with sincerity that I could be anything I wanted to be. I got to go to college and eventually get my Master's Degree. Being an educator, I truly believe in the power of an education. Even if someone didn't come from the same background as me, education would be their way into a better life. Because of my degrees, I am in a place where I can provide the type of life I want my children to have.

4. Most of all, I'm thankful that God saved me from the life that could have been. Since I've gone to church my whole life, I can't even really imagine what life without God might look like. However, I see people every day who live that life. There is no hope in it. When crises happen, there's nowhere to turn. They turn to drugs or to hurting themselves because there is no relief from the pain. They can't ever stop thinking about how they've been hurt; there is no one there to help carry their burdens. I really don't know how they go on every day. Life is hard even for those of us who lean on God to carry us through, but at least we have the hope of Heaven and abundant joy in the process. Praise God that He is my hope and salvation- my ever present help in time of need.

Obviously, the reason that I was slapped in the face with these things is because I saw the opposite. I saw children whose parents still live in selfishness and are more concerned with themselves than their kids. I saw kids who know that their parents care more about something else than them and are looking so hard for someone to love them best that they don't hold any respect for themselves. I saw teenagers who had to experience two adults in physical combat because that is the way the "parents" believe that things should be solved in a marriage. I saw students that are so consumed with problems at home that they don't care about their education and are actually pushing away the one thing that can help them get out of that life. I saw adults and children who just have no hope for tomorrow. They are just trying to survive today and they see no light at the end of the tunnel. I saw people who have nowhere to turn.

This is what can be hard about my job, but its also what's great about it. There are times when God needs to stop me in my tracks as I am living this cushy blessed life and make me realize just what I have. Not only that, but I have a chance to help. God has put me in a position that I can be a positive influence in the lives of these kids. I can't change what has happened to them, nor can I really change their circumstances. However, I can be that person that cares. I can be that person who tells them that education can be their way out. I can work with them to help them understand what love should truly look like. Most of all, I can pray specifically for them. My childhood, my marriage, my education, and my faith have all prepared me for such a time as this. I pray every day that God will give me an opportunity to show His love and He responds every day by doing just that. I miss those opportunities a lot and I fail sometimes, but I'm given the opportunities. And for that in itself, I'm so thankful!

God Bless!

Manesseh

T Minus 8 School Days and Counting

Only eight school days left until Spring Break! Jason and I are as bad as the kids about counting down the days. This quarter is usually the one that drags out and seems forever long, but it has actually gone by pretty quickly. That could be due to the number of breaks that we got for snow days, or maybe just because my job gets so busy during this time of year. Either way, Spring Break is coming. Usually we take a ski trip, but this year we're doing something a little bit different. Okay, a lot different. We're heading to Haiti to visit the orphanage and spend some time with Sammy and Jasmine. My mom and sister and Jason and I are going to spend a few days down there. The kids will get to stay with us in the guesthouse and we can take them swimming and hopefully to the beach. Needless to say, I'm super excited to get to meet them and spend some time with them!

I haven't really processed through what I expect of the experience yet. Obviously, I know that it will be great to get to know the kids that will soon be joining our family. And I also understand that it is going to be difficult to leave there without them. However, I really haven't thought too much about what the week will be like and what we will see. I've seen lots of pictures of the orphanage and the kiddos, but I'm sure my feelings about those won't be anything close to what I'll feel when I'm there. I know that it will break my heart to think about all these children that have no parents for whatever reason- all of those children who are hoping and waiting that someone will choose them to be a part of their forever family. My husband has already told me that I can only have one because he and I both know I'll want to take more of them home. I am also sure that it will make me sad to see the conditions that they live in. It always does. Every time I've spent some time in the poor areas of Mexico, it gets to me. My family has so much and I've had so many opportunities; it always makes me feel so selfish to think that there are times when I complain and gripe about my life. However, its a humbling experience and its nice to get outside of my world every once in a while and gain a fresh understanding of how blessed I am. I fully expect to feel that way. I also fully expect to be in tears as I leave the orphanage and even hours after, especially since I won't know when I will get to see those kiddos again. I am also not sure how I'll do being away from Cade for that long. We've spent a few nights away before, but never a full week. I know he'll be in good hands with my in-laws and I'm not worried about him. I just know that I miss him for the few hours that I'm away at school during the day, so it will be really hard to be away for so many days. I'll make it though! I'm glad he gets to spend some extended time with his grandparents that he doesn't get to see often enough. Part of me wishes he could go with us and meet his brother, but I'm glad we'll get to spend some one-on-one time with Sammy and let him get to know us so that he will feel a little more comfortable when the adoption does go through.

We have made some progress with the adoption. All of the paperwork is done, certified, translated, and at its temporary home at the Haitian Consulate in Chicago. From there, we'll send it to the attorneys in Haiti and we'll wait for it to finalize through the Haitian government. We're hoping that it only takes a few months more, but there's no way to tell. Just keep praying that there won't be any snags and that we can get our kids safely and quickly. 

So, just about a week and a half and we'll be on a plane to Port au Prince. I'm excited and anxious at the same time. I can't wait to see the kids, but I am already dreading leaving them. However, more than anything I am thankful for this opportunity and for the road that God has led us down. I'm so thankful that His thoughts are not my thoughts and His ways are not my ways. I never dreamed we'd be here, but God knew!

God Bless!

Manesseh

Wild Goose Chase

In our Sunday School class, we've been studying a book called Wild Goose Chase. According to the author, Celtic Christians used to refer to the Holy Spirit as the "Wild Goose" because of how mysterious He is, but also because of the adventure that the Christian life can be when we are chasing Him. The book is about how we as Christians get complacent and bored in our walk with Christ and we lose that adventure. We often miss out on all that the Christian life can be because we are not chasing the Wild Goose. It talks about the reasons why we fail to live the adventure including our responsibilities, our assumptions, and our guilt about our past failures. The book challenges the reader to stop putting God in our own little box and start chasing the Wild Goose so that we can see what adventures God has in store and truly glorify Him with our lives. My point in saying all this is that this study really has me thinking about the possibilities. I don't think I even grasp how big God is. I've seen Him work in my life and in the lives of those around me, but I think that too often I do put God in a box that is the same size as my biggest problem. I really do feel like I am currently in the middle of God's will with my family and my career, but I think that too often I make assumptions about what the future might hold. I will say that Jason and I both had always assumed that we would have at least two children three years apart (both boys in our minds) and that we might have a third down the road. Obviously, we are not limiting God based on that assumption. However, I have also always assumed that I would be a school counselor for the rest of my career (33 more years) and that Jason and I would stay here in Alma and raise our family. That may very well be God's will for me, but there may be other things in store. That is the challenge that I am facing right now, determining what assumptions I have made about God's will and about my life and pinpointing areas in which I need to open my mind and my heart and find the courage to chase the Wild Goose. Its a thought-provoking book and a good read I might add.

Switching gears, there is some news on the adoption front. We have now completed the certification process for all of the documents that need to be submitted. They are in the translation process now and as soon as that is completed, they will go to the Haitian consulate and that part of the process will begin. My prayer is that there will be no delays and that these precious kiddos will get to come to their forever homes soon. Also, we are probably going to go visit the orphanage on Spring Break and get to spend some time with little Sammy so I'm super pumped about that! The hard part will be coming back to the United States without him! I already told Jason to prepare himself because I will cry. He told me to remember that we can only take one home. I can pick out kids for the rest of you to adopt if you want! :) Just continue to say prayers for that orphanage, for those precious kiddos, and for this adoption process- no hangups!

Thanks for all the prayers thus far. Blessings to all!

Manesseh

Loving the Snow!

So, we've had a bunch of snow this winter and Cade generally hasn't been a fan. Every time that there is snow on the ground, he makes us carry him to the car and has zero interest in touching it. So, this morning when we woke up to three or so inches of snow, I got the response I expected from him when I asked if he wanted to go play in it, "Nuh-uh. That too cold." However, after some convincing and a promise that we could make Frosty, he got excited and we went outside. At first, he just stood there. He wouldn't walk in it- he'd make us come get him and move him to where we were. He was "frozen" in the snow, no pun intended. As the snowman started coming together, he got a little more into it. By the end of our hour and a half outside, he was running in it, eating it, tackling us in it, making snow angels, and loving it. When he woke up from his nap, he wanted to go back outside. So, hopefully next time he'll be more excited. We'll see- you never know with him.

Cade, Daddy, and Frosty

Eating the snow! 

Now, we've had fun in the snow, but we're educators so snow equals going to school longer in the summer. Truthfully, neither of us are too bitter about it right now. I work later anyway and I'm not sure if I'll have to add those days on the end of my contract- probably, but oh well. I'm really enjoying all of the time home with my hubby and little man- now or later. The snow is so stinking beautiful and so much fun! I think we're going to try some sledding tomorrow. You know, you've got to take the days that God gives you to spend time with your family and make the best of them. So, that's what we're gonna do! Enjoy the snow everyone! :)

"Cade-isms"

My last few posts have been quite intense, so for all of our sakes, this one will be a lot lighter. My child is almost 2 and 1/2 and everyday he says or does things that make us laugh. Jason and I kept saying that we needed to write them down, so on our way to Pine Bluff yesterday, we made a list. The list made me laugh, so I thought I'd share a few for your enjoyment.

He loves to push the buttons and ride the "alligator", which most people refer to as an elevator.

He comes home every day and fills Charis (our dog) in on the day's activities. He tells her where he's been and what he's done.

Basketball is his favorite and after he shoots it, he yells "Three!" then he turns in a full circle and shoots it while yelling, "Three-six-e."

He has a ridiculous sense of direction and tells us which exits to take on the interstate to get to certain places. If we don't go the way he says, it is very upsetting!

He has learned to spell his name and now thinks that every word is spelled "C-A-D-E". When asked how to spell Mommy, he says "C-A-D-E, Mommy!"

After he makes a basket or runs for a touchdown, he makes us sing the Razorback fight song. Every time.

He is obsessed with all things Apple: iPods, iPhones, and iPads and can work them better than some adults. However, he refers to them all as "Bees"- not sure why.

When asked about Sammy, he says "Sammy is your brother. You share toys with him." Its as if someone has said that to him a few times!

Finally, he always refers to himself in the third person. "Cade do this, Cade see that, Cade play with toys." He used to call himself "Nade", so actually using his name is an improvement. However, when teaching him his name, I sounded I out for him so many times that when you ask him his name, he tells you it is "Cuh, cuh, Cade Moore."

He's so sweet and cute and stinking funny! I love this age so much! Can't wait till I have two of them to entertain me, because there's never a dull moment!





God bless,
Manesseh

Saying Goodbye

This week I had to say goodbye to my sweet 81 year old Grandad who went to be with the Lord on Wednesday. Fortunately in my life, I've never had to deal with death much, so this has been a whole new experience for me. It hasn't been easy, but I am so comforted by the fact that my Grandad is now with Jesus. When I found out that he was fading, my prayer was that he would go quickly and peacefully and God answered that prayer and took him just a few hours later. I watched him go, without pain and suffering, calmly and quietly, and for that I am so thankful.

I have to tell you that my Grandad was something else. He was a very kind and gentle man, a man who was prepared for anything and who analyzed everything. Every time he and my Mamaw wanted to buy a new car, it would take him two or three months to decide on which one they wanted. He wanted to make sure that he made the right decision. I really think that it was because he wanted to make sure that my Mamaw was taken care of, because she was always going to get to drive the new car and he took the old one. He was a true gentleman- a man who still opened doors for his wife, who made sure that she had a plate before filling hers, a man who peeled the potatoes for her because the arthritis in her hands made it too hard for her to do so. Even right before his death, his concern was for her. He spent his whole life making sure she was taken care of, and he accomplished his goal. His concern was for those around him and he worked hard, up to the time he went into the hospital, to make sure that his family was provided for.

My Grandad was funny and witty and he loved to joke around. I loved to see that big old smile when I'd one upped him in our banter. He'd smile and shake his head as if to say, "I give up, you win." We shared some common interests, especially in sports, and every time the Razorbacks would lose, he'd tell Jason and I that we just didn't cheer hard enough. I loved to listen to him tell stories about his days in the Army, especially while he was in Germany, and he loved to listen to me talk about my school, my job, whatever was going on. I never had a doubt in my mind that my Grandad was proud of me and that he supported me in everything I wanted to do. He was the best grandfather that a girl could ever ask for and a man that taught me a lot of things- how to be unselfish, the value of hard work, the importance of being responsible. But more than what he taught me is what he gave to me, and that was love. He was a major piece of the foundation that is my family, and the heritage that I will pass on to my children and grandchildren.

I'll miss my Grandad very much, but I know he is with Jesus. I know that I will see him again. My heart aches and probably will every time I think of him, but I am so thankful that I had the chance to know him and to love him for 28 years. I'm so thankful that God chose him to be my Grandad.

This seems like another bump on the very bumpy road our family has traveled lately. We've dealt with the long-term separation from my sister, my mother's breast cancer, the persistent longing to get those Haitian babies here, and now this. I don't say that to throw a pity party, I say that to testify to God's faithfulness. Our lives have changed, but God's faithfulness has not. He has been there in the mountains and in the valleys. He has strengthened me when I felt I had no strength, He has comforted me in my tears, He has given me peace when I've questioned Him as to why. His character has not changed. A friend reminded me the other day that we still serve the same God that was with David as he slew Goliath. He's the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow and I am thankful for that stability. I want to use these experiences to help other people. I can't guarantee that I can talk to you about any of this without tears, but I will talk. I've already seen God use these things for good and I look forward to seeing how He'll use them in the future.

Saying goodbye is hard, but its much easier when comforted by the fact that my Grandad is sitting with Jesus. Oh what a glorious day, and thanks to His sweet grace, our separation is not permanent. I'll see my Grandad again and together we'll praise our holy and glorious God for eternity.

God bless,

Manesseh

Living With Boys

It's been a great weekend with my boys, but as I sit here, I am surrounded with the noise of my son running around "scoring touchdowns" with my husband hammering in the background. I look around to find army men and "Football Guys" scattered all across my floors. Shoes are scattered throughout the house, and shirts, pants, and socks are strewn about. For the record, I cleaned my house pretty well yesterday. The point is, living with boys is an adventure, and one that has taken some getting used to! 

Before getting married I had never lived with boys (aside from my father). Most of you probably know, but I have two sisters. Obviously when I went to college, I lived with girls. I had eight different roommates in my four years. Let me clarify that, it sounds like I'm really hard to live with. I lived in an apartment with three other girls at a time. Because of graduation or transferring, I had eight different roommates. No one moved out because we couldn't get along, just for the record. The point is, until Jason, I had only lived with girls. Then we got married and then Cade came along. Now I live with just boys. And its a whole different world.

First of all, girls tend to be neater. Now, I can't say that all the girls I lived with had rooms that were spic-and-span, but we all kept the common areas neat, mainly out of courtesy for each other. My boys, not so much. I spend half of my life picking up after them, and I mean both of them. Obviously my two year old scatters his toys around the house, I don't think that's just a boy thing. However, along with his toys are his clothes. The second he gets home, he starts stripping. First the shoes, then the socks, then the shirt and pants, until he's left with only his big boy underwear. It does not matter how cold it is in the house, he strips on down. And he gets it from his father who does the same thing. That's a new concept to me- sitting around watching tv in your underwear. But that's my boys for you.

Second of all, girls tend to be quieter. Now that's not to say that it didn't get loud from time to time at my parents' house or in my college apartment. However, just not the same kind of loud. Girls are loud when they get all giggly or decide to dance and sing along to the radio or a CD. Boys are just loud all the time. They walk loud, they run loud, they talk loud, they play loud. Neither one of my boys understands the concept of a whisper and both feel the need to yell at me from another room instead of getting up to walk in to where I am. Jason listens to the TV loudly and Cade wants all of his toys to make noise at the same time. Quiet is not something I get around here very often.

Finally, girls tend to be calmer. Again, I had some hyper roommates and there were times in which my sisters and I got to be pretty rowdy. However, my boys are hardly ever calm. Wrestling, throwing things at each other or "shooting baskets" in anything they can find, playing chase around the house, jumping up and down on the couch or the bed, or just my husband tickling my child until he cackles so hard he is barely breathing, they are always moving. My husband can't be still- awake or asleep. Cade is the same way. Sitting down for more than a few minutes at a time is unheard of. Cade just moves from toy to toy, from activity to activity all day long. Even when its time to go to sleep, he does somersaults in his bed until finally falling asleep.

All of this to say, living with boys has been an adjustment to me, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love the craziness that they bring. I love the fact that my house is always alive with laughing, talking, running, and playing. I love that they are so full of life and never dull. I love that I sometimes step on army men or "Football Guys" and that I get tackled a few times a day. These boys bring so much joy to my life!

Not to say that I will never have a daughter, because God's plans are greater than mine, but right now it sure looks like I'll always be in a house full of boys. I think its loud and crazy now, adding Sammy to the picture will make it even more so. However, I think that raising boys is a very important calling. Men are to be the spiritual leaders of the household, and it is up to me as their mother to help develop in them a heart that chases after God. Fortunately, I have a partner in life who wants to help me in that mission. Together, we hope to teach them how to be polite and chivalrous men who seek God's will for their lives. I'm already praying now for their wives (who may not even be born yet) and for their future families. Before I know it, the loud and crazy house that currently belongs to me will be quiet as they grow up and become men. However, I'm going to cherish every second of it and prayerfully seek God's face in the midst of the chaos. I know that God has a purpose for all of my boys and I can't wait to see the men they will turn out to be!

Snow Days, Hospitals, and Big Boy Underwear

Well, the snow came down enough to get me a snow day this week, so Monday I got to stay home with both of the boys (Jason was off Monday and Tuesday). I seriously considered not taking Cade out to play in it, but I gave in. Last year when it snowed, Cade just sat in it and ate it, but he thought it was pretty cool. This year, he didn't even want to touch it. When we went outside, he said, "Mommy, snow on the floor" and walked very gingerly in it. Jason and I were making snowballs and throwing them at each other and at him. He laughed and laughed and would say, "Mommy, throw it again" or "Throw snow at Cade" but he did not want to pick it up himself. So, since he wasn't really participating, we didn't stay out long. I can't say I was too disappointed. We still have a little snow on the ground and he makes me carry him to the car every time we go outside because in his words, "Its too cold and Cade no walk on the snow." Who knows why snow isn't cool?

The hospitals part of this post is the downer. Unfortunately, both my grandfather and Jason's grandmother are currently in ICU. My grandad had a bleeding ulcer that landed him there and has had some breathing complications. Jason's grandmother fell and broke her elbow and fractured her pelvis. It has been complicated by medicines and encephalitis. So, we've spent some time at hospitals in the past few weeks. Cade has done really well with it and gone to see them both without being too scared. His favorite thing is to run up and down the hospital halls and he's been pretty entertaining to the people in the waiting rooms. All I can say is thank goodness for iPhones and instant streaming from Netflix. I think he's watched Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs around 10 times. Please pray for our grandparents as they are slowly making progress. Pray for our parents as well as they have been charged with caring for both the sick grandparents and the others who are at home. It's been an exhausting few weeks for them.

The big boy underwear part is a celebration! The potty training is going pretty well. He's been wearing big boy underwear and going and peeing on the potty by himself. Woo hoo! Last night, I just found pee in the little potty- he never said anything to me about it. So, he decided he needed to go and went. He's done that a few more times today! So, I'm celebrating and hoping for no regression. He still doesn't want to poop in the potty. Today he asked me for a Pull-Up, so I put one on him, and he pooped in it. Then he wanted big boy underwear again. I guess that's better than him pooping in his underwear and it means that he recognizes that he has to go. Its frustrating because he does know what to do and is choosing not to. However, I'll take what I can get right now. I have to say our babysitter has been amazing in all this and I credit our progress to her. He's only a few months over two and we're getting there. I never knew how excited I could get about urine and excrement until I had a toddler. It's really the little things!

Still no word from the FBI on the background check- the waiting game continues! So for now, we'll keep doing what we can do- praying for Sammy and keeping in touch with the orphanage so we can see him as much as possible. He's in good hands, but I want him to be in my arms. However, I'll wait patiently and enjoy my time with Cade as an only child.

Here's hoping for more snow, no more hospitals, and a permanent move to big boy underwear while we're waiting!

God bless,
Manesseh

Let It Snow!

Well, the first snow of the year is finally falling. I don't know if it will be enough to get us out of school, but I'm excited anyway (as long as I'm inside). The older I get the more I subscribe to my mom's philosophy of only liking it to be this cold if I'm in the mountains with skis strapped to my feet. I wish we were taking a Spring Break ski trip this year, but we're trying to save money for our (hopefully this year) trip to Haiti to pick up the sweet kiddos. I'll trade skiing for that anytime. When I was still in the classroom, I really wasn't too fond of snow days because it threw off my lesson plans (my former students can attest to this), but now that I'm on extended contract, I'm not sure if I have to make up the days, so let it snow!

On a totally different topic, we got to Skype with my sister in South Africa for about an hour today. She's spending the next few weeks in Capetown where she will be working at a camp for high school kids. That's right up her alley, so she's excited. She's also staying in a place with hot showers, so she's doubly excited. It was great to get to visit with her for awhile.

Today is usually one of the days when we get to Skype with Jasmine and Sammy, but for whatever reason we didn't get to today. The people who run the orphanage have been out of town for a few weeks, so I'm sure they're just trying to get everything settled. Hopefully two weeks from now we'll get to talk with our precious children. Cade told me this morning when I told him that we might get to see Sammy on the computer today that Sammy is his brother and he's going to share his toys with him. We've been trying to prepare him as much as you can a two-year-old, but it was great to hear him say that at the simple mention of Sammy's name. I'm not sure that Cade fully comprehends the extent to which he will have to share everything with Sammy, but at least he's aware. I do wonder (not worry, really) about what the transition is going to be like for Cade. He's the only child and the only grandchild on both sides, so he's not really used to sharing his stuff or his people. However, he's a social child and plays well with others, so I don't think it will take him long to figure it out (probably faster than I will figure out how to be a mom to two children instead of one). I know that Sammy will be different from Cade and have his own set of issues, so that is one of my continual prayers- wisdom in parenting both of them well. More than anything I want them to grow to be men after God's own heart. That's going to mean that Jason and I have to be close to God's heart- and that is where we are continually seeking to be!

Well, it's coming down hard now. Welcome, Old Man Winter! Let it snow!

Our Cross

One of my favorite quotes is from Oswald Chambers in "My Utmost for His Highest". He said, "God does not ask us to do the things that are easy to us. He only asks us to do those things that we are perfectly fit to do through His grace, and that is where the cross we must bear will always come."

That came into my head today as I was talking with kids. I'm listening to them talk about their lives. Some of them have seen more in their fifteen years than anyone should see in three lifetimes. They come from homes with abuse, drugs, alcohol, and gangs. I found myself thinking- "What am I doing here? Why have I chosen to subject myself daily to these things that break my heart?" Trust me, this part of the job is not easy to me. Helping students pick classes, giving them tips for improving grades, scheduling, and organizing testing- that I can do! But it is a struggle for me to keep dry eyes as I listen to these kids talk. That's where the quote came into my head. God asks us to carry our cross, and with His grace we can follow our calling. This is my cross. This is my calling. God didn't ask me to do it because it would be easy for me, God asked me to do it because He knew it would make me see that I can't do it and I have to rely on Him and His sweet grace.

I'm not going to pretend like I don't hope for drama-free days at work, because I do. But I know that when the days come in which I am challenged, that I am perfectly fit to do this job through His grace. And I'm so thankful for that grace!

God just laid that on my heart today and I wanted to share. God's grace will help you carry that cross, so pick it up!

God bless,
Manesseh

The State of our Union

Well you can see the nerdy former Civics teacher in me by the title of this post. However, I realized the other day that I explained that by blogging, I would be able to keep everyone updated on the current state of things, yet I didn't really explain where we currently are. So, this blog purposes to be informational and to let you know where things are.

The Adoption: We are currently in a state of "hurry up and wait" (which will likely be the norm for us throughout this process). We are waiting on the FBI to complete the background checks. This could take up to twelve weeks. We're around five weeks in. Once the background check comes back, the documentation will go to be translated into French and will then move into the hands of the Haitian government. I fully expect that to be a fairly long process. However, it makes sense to me for our babies to arrive this summer. But as I well know, my time and God's time are not always the same. I know that He's an on-time God, so I'll trust His judgment (like I really have a choice)! :)

My Sister's Trip: She is currently in Capetown, South Africa, where she will spend a few weeks in ministry. After being in some of the most remote places on Earth, she is excited to be in quasi-modern civilization. This will be her last month in Africa (this is month 7 of 11). She'll finish the last four months in Asia-I'm not completely sure which countries she'll be in yet- then return home at the end of May or first of June. I am so amazed at her experiences and what she's learned. Continue to pray for her and her team as they minister to people around the world!

My Mom: My mom is doing awesome! She's back to running now, of course. Once the doctor cleared her, she was back into the exercise thing. She'll get a few more "fills" over the next few months (putting saline into the spacers that are currently in her breasts), and then have the implants put in. At that point it will be done. We're just so thankful that no more treatment is necessary!

Our Family's Current Events: Jason is still going to school and working toward his Superintendent's license. He's got at least a few more semesters. He's considering continuing through the Doctoral program and getting that Doctorate degree. I'm so proud of him and his hard work! He wants to be in district-level administration at some point, and it takes some schooling to get there. Eventually, we'll be out of school for good. Eventually. Now that Christmas Break is over, I'm back to work and that's about all (besides being a wife and mommy). This semester should be quite interesting as it is my first "testing season" as a school counselor. Junior Highs have TONS of tests, so that will consume a lot of my time. I actually have my first testing meeting tomorrow. I can't say I'm super excited, but its part of the job! Cade is in the middle of potty training. He is really good about going pee on the potty if I take him every hour, but not so great at volunteering. Twice tonight, however, he went to the bathroom, pulled down his pants, and went potty on his own. We are having a party around here and rewarding him like crazy! The pooping thing is not going too well, and any suggestions are welcomed!  His new thing is to tell us what he likes and doesn't like. However, his likes are very situational as my child who never stops eating and will eat most anything told me the other day he didn't like food. This was because he didn't want to stop playing with his train set to come eat. It's so much fun to be bossed around by a two-year-old. For the record, I don't often do what he says! :)

We really enjoyed our Christmas Break together, but Cade was so ready to go back to the babysitter's today, and I didn't mind returning to my job. We're so blessed and so thankful!

A New Year

I've tried the blogging thing before and never really felt like I had much to say. However, with the changes coming into our lives and our amazing friends and family who have showed so much concern and compassion, I felt like maybe I should try it again. So, here is the blog- a place where I will try to keep everyone updated on what is happening with the adoption, a possible new home, my sister's adventure, parenting, and our jobs. I can't guarantee that it will be supremely interesting, but we have had so many people committed to praying for us that I wanted to have an outlet for them to know how their prayers are being answered. So, here it is!

Today is 1/1/11, which I think is pretty cool. What I think is even cooler is that I am doing absolutely nothing. I took down the Christmas decor and cleaned the house yesterday, so I plan on staying under my soft fuzzy blanket most of the day. However, this lack of plans has given me time to reflect on 2010 and dream about 2011.

This past year has been eventful for the Moore family:

Jason graduated with his Master's Degree in Educational Leadership (to be a principal) in May.  He applied for several jobs, but is currently still teaching and waiting for the right opportunity. God knows where he's supposed to be.

In June, I accepted a new job as a school counselor in a different district. This decision was not easy for me and I was very conflicted over leaving the district that I had grown up in and that I love so much. However, I felt like God was leading me to this and giving me an opportunity to use the passions and skills that He has been developing in me my whole life. I am glad I followed His calling because this job has taught me so much about myself and about who I am called to be.

In July, my sister left for an eleven-month mission trip around the world, which means she will be gone until the end of May/first of June- no coming home. I am so proud of her for following this calling and I know that she is learning so much about herself and about our Heavenly Father. Her mission trip led to one of the biggest decisions of our lives. Here's the story for those of you who don't know it. For those of you who do, sorry for the repeat. She spent her second month (August) of her trip at an orphanage called HIS Home for Children in Haiti. During one of our Skype conversations, she mentioned to me that there is a little boy there that she wanted Jason and I to adopt. Micah and I both laughed, but that comment stayed in my heart. I thought about it and prayed about it and then mentioned it to my husband, fully expecting him to tell me that I was crazy. However, his response was quite the opposite as he agreed to prayerfully consider it. Together, we prayed about it and discussed it and felt like God was calling us to it. We found out around the same time that God had planted it in my parents' heart to do the same, just with a 9 year old little girl in the orphanage. We decided on it separately and were delighted at the way the Lord works. So, we are currently in the process of adopting from Haiti. The time frame is unknown to us (patience is not mine or Jason's biggest virtue- so that's hard), but we know that it is known to God. My hope and prayer is that Jasmine and Sammy will be here by this summer and I will have two new family members- a son and a sister. I really have no idea what to expect. Sammy will probably be almost 3 by the time he gets here. He's only 6 weeks younger than Cade, so I'll basically have twins. I've had several people feel the need to tell me adoption horror stories they've heard. Let me say that I know that this will be a challenge. However, let me also say that God will not leave us nor forsake us and where He guides, He provides. Jason and I feel very strongly that this is where God wants our family. This is not what we ever expected our family to be, as we were actually in the process of trying for another baby when we decided to adopt (were is the operative word, I don't feel like God is calling us to have 3 year old twins and a newborn). I've seen firsthand through this process that our plans and God's plans are sometimes very different, but that surrender to Him is the only option. I plan on being challenged, but more than that I plan on being blessed through having Jasmine and Sammy. God has blessed our family so much with a wonderful support system as well as material things, and I just want to share that with someone who needs it, and if anyone does, its those orphans.

In the midst of all of that, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer in September. Fortunately, they caught it very early and were able to treat it. Though it was only in one breast, she elected to have a double mastectomy and through that surgery, they were able to get it all. She is now cancer free and not doing any radiation or chemo therapy. I knew before this that my mother was a strong woman, but you wouldn't even believe how strong. She faced this head-on with a faith that was unwavering. She has used this experience to minister to other women and to set an example of how to lean on God through adversity. I was also amazed through this experience at how much support our family has. I will never know the number of prayers that were sent up for my mom and our family, but I know that there was an outpouring of love. This was just another example of how blessed our family is. For all of you that prayed and supported us, thank you!

Cade turned two in September. The twos have been an adventure. He really has always been a pretty easy kid- and the twos are no different, with the exceptions of the temper tantrums and the ups and downs of potty training. However, we are very blessed- he is happy, healthy, and sweet. He's funny, too! You never know what he's going to say. I love being a mommy.

Jason's sister got married in October. I now have a new brother-in-law (I guess that's what he is to me). We wish Rachel and Kirill all the best in their marriage!

December brought the hankering for a new house. With Sammy coming and this space growing smaller and smaller, we are ready for something bigger. We've prayerfully considered it and worked hard to get ours ready to sell. It is now on the market- for sale by owner! Add that to another thing that we're waiting on God's timing for. He's always been perfect and this will be no different!

One last thing that seems small compared to all of these big events of 2010, but I donated my hair to Locks of Love! This is really a big accomplishment for me, as I am the one who gets constant hankerings to cut my hair off. I just wake up some mornings and think I want a new haircut, then I go and get it cut that day. So for me to grow my hair for two and a half years without cutting it short was a big, big deal. Now its short again and I love it. I'm sure I will donate again in the future!

Well, I hope you were prepared to read a novella because that was a lengthy recap of this year for us. Next year hopefully brings our new child, a principal's job for Jason, and a new home. As I wrote this, I cried (which is no big surprise for those of you who know me well) and I laughed. 2010 was quite a year, but more than anything, it just brings hope for 2011 and countless examples of the Lord's faithfulness that we know will never end.